ritual for january 07: purify
You wouldn't think of going to an important event in dirty clothes, so why not pay attention to cleansing your energy field, as well as your physical space. Do some spring clearing, throw out old broken items, spray lemon water around your office, use your morning bath or shower as a ritual of purification, let go of old emotions that no longer serve you, shred old letters that hold negative associations, delete any email that is not positive. (original article)
Today was weird. It's been one of those days where everything was just...off. Nothing synced, I felt simultaneously foggy and wired. For one, there's a frenetic energy around today's global launch of The Desire Map Licensing program. Multiple iDevices were beeping and buzzing and blaring at me all day. I felt the urgent need to handle at least 27 things at once and strike my entire Desire Map-related to do list while the iron was hot, as it were. But guess what? That didn't feel good. The irony is that the entire core of The Desire Map is feeling good. Whoopsie.
With that realization finally sinking in, the purification that today called for did not look like creating one more thing to do, as the prompt suggests. Today called for the permission to just. say. no. Cancel. Reschedule. Cross it off the list without remotely completing it. Just no. I rescheduled a dinner with a friend so I could have my entire day to do what I needed to do. I unsubscribed from six e-mailng lists. I took time to refine my to-do list into prioritized categories, allowing me to settle down and realize there are not in fact 27 things that I MUST do RIGHT now. I changed an RSVP to NO for a group call with a thyroid health coach. I ignored mountains of texts for hours (gasp). I reset my mojo in a hot salt bath. When I'm done with this post I'm going to journal and meditate and fall asleep by 10pm.
If you haven't made friends with NO, trust me when I tell you it's one of the most liberating gifts you can give yourself. It's an act of radical self-care. I'm an evangelist for NO because I spent three decades of my life saying YES to everything and everyone that I was supposed to say YES to. Ugh. Lame. I'm exhausted at the mere memory of it. Listen, my love, take it on good authority from someone who's proudly owned NO for years now: You're not irresponsible, you're not rude, and yes, people will still like you. You want people in your life who support your radical self-care. Including you.
Lesson learned for 2015: You are worthy of your desires. If you want to say no, say no. If you want to say yes, say yes. Do what feels good to do. Yes, love yourself enough to do exactly that.
Love + a well-placed no,
P.S. How comfortable are you saying no? How comfortable are you canceling, rescheduling, or doing what you need to do to take care of yourself? Are you saying yes out of fear? I'd love to know where you're at in your own self-care journey.