Life is not meant to be lived in boxes.
No, I'm not referring to the boxes currently stacking up around my condo. Packing (and mostly purging) everything I own is necessary for me to launch into my next adventure as a digital nomad. I'm referring to our emotional lives. Our emotional lives are not meant to be lived in a series of separate boxes. I had my first-ever session with an intuitive energy healer this week and I want to share a lesson that's coming through loud and clear to me:
We're meant to live whole, beautiful, messy, graceful lives aligned with our highest self. We're not meant to parse ourselves into restrictive boxes.
During my 90-minute session with the energy healer, I kept making distinctions between my work self, my friend self, my romantic self, my coach self, etc. She gently reminded me that I'm just one person and I need to integrate in order to fully heal. It instantly rang true. A lack of emotional integration is what fried my adrenals and pushed me into an autoimmune disease to begin with. It was too stressful and unhealthy for me to keep up one appearance over there, another over here, and yet another behind closed doors. Eventually my soul's misalignment manifested in my body and everything just shut down.
What's happening in my healing journey lately is what I want to offer as a challenge to you: spiritual integration.
I'm working my way through deep healing processes, and that means I'm working my way toward my core self. Along the way, I'm letting anything that doesn't support my higher self fall by the wayside. This includes people, habits, beliefs, relationships, certain foods, possessions, anything and everything. If it doesn't support my higher self, it's gone. I'm officially giving you permission to do the same.
Because here's the truth, love: You're not perfect. You never will be. It's really liberating! How boring is perfection, anyway? You no longer need to be one thing for this person and something else for that person - usually with the goal of making them comfortable and yet the outcome of making you miserable (right?). You just need to be you. Just be whole, powerful, joyful, gorgeous you. Integrate, darling. It's time.
How? What does the process of spiritual integration look like?
You integrate with your core self by first coming to know your core self. Start by asking: Am I one person with my friends and another person with my family? Am I this way with my partner and that way at work? Then get real with yourself: Which version of me makes me really happy? Which version do I wish I could be all day every day, no matter the audience or the circumstances? Your gut reaction is the answer. You already know.
Now the fun part: Find at least one way to bring your core self out to play this week. Put a citrine crystal on your desk in the stuffy law firm offices because you do secretly attend full moon fire ceremonies in your spare time. Share with your boyfriend exactly what you'd like him to do for/with/to you tonight, without shyness or apology. Go to lunch with a friend and start the conversation by sharing something they don't already know about you, then ask them to reciprocate.
The cumulative effect of this experiment is a growing sense of permission and expansion. I promise you.
You deserve to be radically happy. You deserve to live every day as your whole, beautiful, messy, graceful self. I'm cheering you on. Let me hear from you in the comments...how are you integrating your core self into your life?
Love + courage,